Niki and I went to see Borat this weekend. But it was sold out…five hours in advance. So we decided to use the Ole Latham Sneaking Into Sold Out Movie Trick. What’s the Ole Latham Sneaking Into Sold Out Movie Trick, you say? That’s where I buy a ticket to a movie I don’t want to see, give the ticket stub to the ticket taker, and make a b-line to the sold out movie I do want to see. It works all the time. And it’s named after me because no one else has ever thought to do this before. Ever.
And so on Saturday I bought two tickets to Marie Antoinette (a movie both Niki or I really didn’t want to see) and planned to sneak into Borat (a movie we did really want to see). We even got there 30 minutes early to make sure our fool-proof plan would work. However, when we entered the theater, we realized it was going to be harder than we thought. The ticket taker was standing directly in front of the entrance to Borat. Plus Borat was on the bottom floor and Marie Antoinette was on the 2nd floor. So there was no way we could slip by the ticket taker. He looked at our tickets, pointed up, and informed us, “next floor.” So we begrugingly walked up the stairs.
But we didn’t give up there. Well Niki gave up. But I would have none of it. We had to somehow sneak down to the ground floor. On the second floor, I snooped around for an escape hatch or a back door leading down stairs. And I found it. It was an escalator that led to a section on the ground floor where nobody was around. I convinced Niki to take it with me and we explored around. We made our way to the opposite side of the entrance leading to Borat. It was roped off and we could see the ticket taker now with his back to us. In order to make it by, we would have to duck under the rope and slip behind the ticket taker without him seeing us. We debated if we should try it or not. It was agreed we should go for it. We staggered the starts so as not to cause attention to ourselves. I went first, and it was easier than I thought. The ticket taker didn’t notice me at all. I speed-walked to the theater and reserved two seats. A few minutes later….Niki made it! We were now safely inside Borat!
All in all Niki showed much bravery for going along with the Ole Latham Sneaking Into Sold Out Movie Trick, especially since we had to improvise a little this time around. I think Borat would have been very proud too. And by the way, the movie was hilarious. You should see it. I’d recommend it to anyone. Especially since technically I owe Borat $20. Sorry ’bout that, dude. But it looks like you’re doing fine. If there’s anybody who could use 20 bucks, it’d be Marie Antoinette.